Apple Trees and Common Spirits

The ability to love and work...
    - Freud's definition of mental health  

Apple love

The apple tree in my garden is abundant with fruit and it is one of my greatest pleasures to go pick the apples out of reach. This simple September routine is solace from the constant uphill struggle of life, of asserting myself in a world where everyone else is trying to do the same. As a twenty something I'm carving my niche, trying to figure out my place in the world - we're all striving for meaning.

In a lunchtime discussion with a colleague at RTC, we mentioned the conflicts between personal life and working in development. Humanitarianism is more a vocation than it is a job, which is why this can inhibit an individuals personal wants for relationships and family. This is one of my greatest concerns, balancing love with work. I place love about everything but I also love my work, it sustains me, motivates me and gives me purpose.

Antonio looking a little like a pub ad.

Antonio and I only yesterday discussed a relief worker job I'd seen which was a 6 month - 1 year placement potentially in any developing country, with training in Switzerland. Antonio is a gnarly, spontaneous kind of person but even so I couldn't expect him to drop everything, his life, his goals, his comfort to go to the back and beyond somewhere. I might jump at the idea of Sudan, The Congo and/or Colombia but they're not every ones ideal destinations!

Antonio helps me live in the moment, he's my agony uncle, my arcade above all my best friend. So to give up on him would be like stabbing myself in the leg - stupid.



Being happy in the canalside cafe



Our differences used to perplex me, how can an artist and a humanitarian survive the contrasts of our professions? In these times where solace is needed I recall the conversation I once had with my good friend Martin, who reminded me that differences are healthy, they give scope and depth to a relationship. What is important is sharing a common spirit, having ideals which overlap.

I look upon the apple tree and let my mind wander about how its a little like my relationship, weathering the elements of life. Sometimes in winter a twig might break but come spring the flowers bloom and the leaves are full again. It is rooted like my love but though stationary it always grows upwards.

I'm determined to nourish a great love AND devote myself to the plight of others.

I believe you can have it all.

Don't wait around for other people to be happy for you. Any happiness you get you've got to make yourself.                                         

- Alice Walker